We’re getting closer and closer to our 1 year anniversary which is SO crazy because I feel like my wedding was just yesterday! On our drive home from our movie date the other night, Kalep & I were talking about our 1st year as newlyweds including the highs, lows, growth, challenges, etc. It’s funny because one of the biggest challenges we had was decorating our home to fit both his & her tastes. There was seriously a point in time where we had to keep our distance from any furniture stores because we’d walk in holding hands & walk out barely speaking (lol!). Luckily, we’ve overcome that and now it’s actually fun going to look for house decor together, or he trusts me enough to leave it up to me now. He gets the outside to do whatever he wants with! 😉 Not all couples are this way though. I know many in which one doesn’t really care or has no input, or the other forgets to ask. There’s some that completely agree on everything together, and there’s some that fall in between. One of my best friends was talking to me the other day about this same exact thing because they’re in that stage right now, so it inspired me to do a blog post about it! Looking back on this last year, these are the ways we best handled it.
Keep it fair & Compromise
Even though we’d all like to have everything done our own way, that’s not the reality in a marriage or a relationship. Both opinions matter & you have to be fair because it’s home for the both of you. I found this challenging because all I had ever decorated was my dorm room and my own apartment, so never had to think about anyone else – let alone a male opinion. It’s important to keep each other’s tastes in mind, and compromise in the best way you can.
Talk Must Haves
This part was easier because it’s not like we both each had a ton of furniture and had to decide on what would stay and what would go. The must haves were minor because we hardly had anything yet. Kalep, no doubt about it, his must haves were his deer mounts. My must haves – obviously, the color gold (which Kalep is definitely not a fan of!)…and some faux fur.
Find Common Ground & find a way to mix up your styles
Kalep & I could not have been any more different when it comes to our own personal style and tastes, but I kind of love that. Aside from the house & what’s inside, he’s shown me so many new things and experiences in life, so it’s nice to not be into exactly the same things. If it was up to him, our house would look like it came straight out of an outdoors magazines filled with deer mounts, cowhides and very rustic furniture. I’m not exactly stuck to a certain style, but I love bright neutrals, greys, gold – just a more feminine look. Those were obviously on complete opposite ends of the spectrum. It worked out for the better though because mixing the two turned out to be even better than I expected! There’s always a way to combine both styles and make it look great! Below are a few areas in our house where both of our styles our combined with the bright neutrals & feminine accents, but still a touch of the rustic style. Another way in which we have found common ground, in a sense, is that he’s learned to trust me with the small things like decor pieces, pillows, most furniture, etc. At first, he swore up and down that I would make our complete house look like my “cloffice,” and ignore his tastes, but he’s seen otherwise. With me, I always go to him on bigger items like flooring, wall fixtures, and those more “manly” things or more costly expenses. He’s actually started leaning towards brightening up our house and doing a lighter color on the walls and going more neutral on things, so we’ve actually learned to love aspects of each other’s tastes.
Trial & Error
Learning to decorate a house for two was a challenge for me. It was hard for me to shop for things because I wasn’t sure if Kalep would love or hate it, but over time, I got better at it. It takes trial & error to get it right, at least for the both of you. I also had my mom & mother in law who had a lot of experience in decorating a home to help me, and who are great at it! I actually loved finding statement pieces like the bull head and cowhide bench that resembled Kalep’s style and mixing it with colors or textures like faux fur that I like. Below are pictures of our bedroom from when I first decorated it to how it is now. It took some trial and error before I finally got it to something we both loved & incorporated both of our styles! I’m a huge DIY-er and thrift shopper, so the whole trial & error thing can be a lot of fun! 😉
Have your own space (if you can)
For a man, that’s normally a man cave. Kalep turned our back shop into his own man cave, which is a great space for him to do whatever he wants with it. For me, I was good with a closet, but our house didn’t have huge closets, so I took a room and made it into a “cloffice.” It’s a perfect space for me to work & get ready in…and fill with whatever decor I like!
Remember your marriage (or relationship) inside the home is more important than the decor.
Be respectful of each other’s tastes.
This is most important to remember because when it comes down to it the love inside your home is worth so much more than the color of a throw pillow, or the rug in your bedroom. Decor is not worth getting into arguments over…even though sometimes it’s hard not to. Also, try not to criticize what your other half likes, and be open to their thoughts and opinions.
Just have fun with it!
Our home still has a long way to go before it’s completely finished, but it’s been such a fun (sometimes challenging) journey making it our home for us…and hopefully, one day for some little ones!
Make the most of your weekend friends…maybe even work on some home projects! 😉